Monday, December 26, 2011

Humbled Dreams of a Distraught Dreamer!

I wish those smiles would last,
I wish those joys would stay

In the midst of a misty ocean,
Lies the frail spirit of dismay

Memoirs of a thankless life,
Sets this wandering soul ablaze

Waiting for the sun to rise,
Hope lures the sense of redemption

Life seems to unfurl in this really funny manner,
Like a new chapter was written every page

To mock at our sense of judgment at each step,
And lead us to a whole new way 

Striving for that one little thing from life, we all live,
something that someone else would easily acquire

And life smirks at us and takes that away,
Leaving us in this pain inducing solitude

Wisdom is all that pain gives but leaves a scar behind,
One that reminds us of how we were irreversibly ruffled

It's a blessing in disguise that these scars are invisible,
Because if they were visible, we'd all be so ugly!


Saturday, December 10, 2011


This one's dedicated to one of the pictures of my friend Alok Jaiswal which prompted me to come up with a caption and the nothingness of the night and this worldly contemplations together reslulted in this poem!

I do not wish to sleep tonight,
for the stars outside shine so bright!

Seeing the horizon light up the sky,
with hazy dragons and little fireflies

The heart plunges into deep thought
Of this heart and those little battles it fought

Times have gone when this heart felt sane
The days of dancing in those lashing rains

That warm smile at the descending of laughter
Those little burst of joys my words were after

Thinking about oblivion, bounded within rage
Mind lost in wanderings, bloodshot eyes and this heart encaged

In submission I've lost all my fears, my mind is running for the sky
I stand in bliss rued by my ignorance, memories flash me by

My life is a haven now, I see the lit horizon in sight
Nothing matters anymore, wrong or right

 Let me forget myself and embrace my inner light
Nothing can stop me, let me lose myself into this dark night!


Tuesday, November 1, 2011


Brows of a nightmare, lashes of sorrows,
False promises of better tomorrows

Signs of a devil dressed in a holy robe,
Descends like an unchecked force unleashed

The flashes of memories that pass you by,
Remains as a reminiscence of the unalterable past.

Deep within lies a latent retrospection
That hardly surfaces to ever bother the mind

The hidden cries in the voice, the depth of the tone
Concealed with perfection with the laughter of a clown

What amazes is the subtle change of senses
Remnants of a feeling of impossibility

That once plagued this anxious heart
To the point from there was no return

The strange feeling of not knowing yourself,
Of being a stranger to the world you know so well

A sense of being out of place
Dampens all the remaining spirits

Is there light at the end of the tunnel?
Or another cloud of darkness waiting in despair?

Moving forward is the rule of life,
I simply walk on wondering what lies ahead!


Saturday, October 8, 2011


Travelling has always been of great interest to me. It opens me up to the infinite hidden things that we miss and those many more people who change the way you percieve things!

He asked me if I needed anything to eat. "Saab vada pav, pav bhaji, misal pav, kuch khaoge?". I shook my head in disagreement and moved forward neglecting something that struck me right away. An impulse of acknowledgement, that something was out of place but I ignored it and moved forward to where I was headed. This was in Panchagani, where I had come on a family visit. We had gone to visit a place called 'table top', so called due to some god forsaken reason that I dint bother much about!

So after the trivial encounter or so I thought, I moved forward to the ground which stretched to a circumference of 8km roughly and had a breathtaking view to say the least. We had come around dusk, so we watched the sun with awe and sat there soaking the diminishing radiance of the setting sun!

Also, the shooting of a movie named 'Zilla Ghaziabad' was going on there starring Vivek Oberoi. Saw him stand metres away from me but still dint feel star struck at all (I would rather not give an explanation here.. for all you Vivek fans out there.. No offence intended). We moved around for some time, clicked pictures and finally when the sun had set and dusk descended its darkness, we moved towards the exit! The walk was a long one and the dark added to the anticipation.

We reached the exit finally, where restaurants were lined up one by another. Stacked in between these restaurants was one such 'SHAHI DARBAR'. We decided to try out the vada pavs there and a child who looked like he was around 12 years of age came out and asked us for our order. The first thought that struck me was 'Child Labour' and then I recalled him asking me what I wanted to eat earlier while I passed the place. We asked for a couple of vada pavs and he gladly went inside and informed a lady, who looked like his mother. He looked fairly confident in his way of talking and was also good in attracting customers to the place. He was good with his service and better with his replys. He was also polite in his conduct. I asked him what his name was. He said that it was 'Krishna', visibly happy at not being called 'chotu' or some other name people deviced for him.

He was moving around from one place to the other, providing food, collecting money and he seemed to have no problem at all doing so. Before leaving I asked him if he went to school. 'Haan bhaiya, jata hu na school, 7th class me padhta hu main', he answered with a huge smile on his face. He told me that as it was the day of the festival of Dussera and a holiday at school, he thought he'd help his mother out at the shop.  He showed real maturity in the way he seemed to approach things. He knew his responsibilities towards the family, at the same time he also knew the importance of education. I thought of talking to him and knowing his views but he was a busy little man and I was a jobless traveller who had all the free advice in the world at that time, so I saved it for myself and wished him luck with his studies. I wondered how many Krishnas actually lived in this country, some of those who only dreamt of studying and there were also some of those who did not even know what education was for. However, I felt happy for this child here and wished he would do something big in life with all the dedication he seemed to possess.

Another encounter occured in a temple at Mahabaleshwar(I really can't recall the name). We visited the temple in the afternoon and there was a decent rush even on a weekday( gods in India have some popularity I tell you). There were a number of shops of handicrafts outside the temple. I saw one such woman who was selling handmade handicraft goods. She seemed like an old lady well beyond the age of 50! Normally, I wouldn't have approached her and talked to her but  this time I managed to cross the intricate boundary of the inter-wound cloud of decency I set upon myself sometimes. Her name, she said was Smt. Saraswati Kadam. I asked her what she did there. She told me that she sold all kinds of products there including eatables. She told me that she had been doing this job for 50 years now(that is a lot of time at any job) and I looked in amazement. She stated that she was married relatively early at the age of 12(child marriage she admitted and agreed times have changed now) and had 3 children.

It was a good experience to talk to her and know that she was a confident woman who believed in working hard to earn.When asked about how educated her children were, she lowered her eyes,visibly embarrassed and said that they were educated fairly enough. Her son worked as a driver now and 2 of her daughters were married but she told me happily that her grandson was going to school. I delicately asked her how much she earned sitting alongside the temple but she only said,"Thoda boht kama leti hu beta, kafi hota hai". Some people came to her shop enquiring about key chains and I wished her luck and left the shop. Though I dint buy anything, she was brightly smiling as someone had taken an interest in her life for once rather than those lifeless items that everyone was obviously eager to know about!

She seemed like a strong willed woman and I hoped more such women took to work in any form to earn and attain economic stability and gain a feeling of self satisfaction and freedom.

In one single day, I had seen two different faces of India, one budding with energy and raring to take the first few strides of life and the other with experienced eyes of having dealt with people, nearing the end of life but willing to fight for the right to live. It was a day of self contemplation at how easy my life had  been so far. The child was happy at the meager tip he got(he gave even that to his mother) and the old lady at the temple was satisfied with the amount she earned too(she said that most of it went away in rent of the shop) and then there was me, not happy with what I got, even when it wasn't me who earned it in the first place. Such incidents give you a reality check and I was given one. It might not change me but it made me aware of the fact of how lucky some of us really have been in life so far!

Now that my journey is at its far end, here, sitting way past midnight, with awakened eyes, I jot this down in the compartment of a train heading towards Hyderabad. The train cuts throught the dark forests and the lines of the POTF song plays in my ear 'We keep driving into the night, its a late goodbye, such a late goodbye'. Come to think of it, a late goodbye it was!


Sunday, September 25, 2011


A very old poem. Had lost it and found it thanks to my friend Soujanya Mandadi who preserved it somehow.. :).. An honest effort at overcoming the inner darkness and shining in the basking glory that the almighty showers upon us. Have fun reading it :)

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -- - - - - 

It was a drastic and catastrophic sight,
The darkest of all nights.

I thought I was going to die of fright,
I believed this was the last time I would see the light.

I was broken from within. Bitterly disappointed again,
Why from my mistakes could I have never gained?

I thought frantically and came with no reply,
I willed to end it all in one final try.

One jump from the top was all it would take,
To end this infinitive misery for heaven's sake.

I took the jump in submission, losing all alternatives in sight,
The jump took all my remaining courage and might.

I had given up to the life I once adored setting any disappointment apart,
All the sweet memories of life flashed past me like little treasures that depart.

But when I thought life was about to fade,
I thought I saw a hazy jade.

I felt the tight grip of a luminescent hand,
A force so strong that helped me land.

I felt like God had embraced me,
And shown me the way to be.

His words filled me with hope and delight,
My worries and apprehensions were out of sight.

I got up startled; gasping for breath; it was a dream,
But it showed me what God was trying to mean,

The value of my life was highly justified,
I thought I should never have given up and cried,

The hope that filled me was comparable to none,
I felt within me, a latent rising sun.

His unparalleled divinity put me on the right way,
And now I'll go on happily till I finally fade away...


Sunday, August 21, 2011


"Corruption has eaten into our country like a deadly virus". How many of us have actually uttered these words? How many of us have just concluded that nothing can actually happen of this country, that this corruption will one day be so common that nothing will seem different. How many of us have frowned upon the thought of the level of corruption in India? I'm one of those people who have thought on these lines and somehow concluded in my mind that nothing would happen unless people changed themselves. That nothing would happen unless we ourselves stop being a part of it.

How easy is it to be a part of corruption and escape, like for example bribe the traffic policeman after violating a traffic rule and escape the headache of a court hearing. How easy is it to bribe a person at the transport office and get a licence or learner's licence in an instant. Corruption in a way has made our lives easier but at what cost?
It is at the cost of disabling and crippling a country like ours. Corruption at a personal level is degrading. We've all talked about the corrupt politicians, about corrupt companies but are we not a part of a similar vicious cycle? Corruption has become a comfortable habit and eased our lives. Somehow, the status of corruption has intensified over the last couple of months.

"PEOPLE MARCH, GOVT CRAWLS" read the headlines of the newspaper Times of India dated 17th August. What had made the mighty UPA government crawl which is rather unaffected by other such trivial occurrences? But this was something that shook them hard too. What force could that have possibly been? What was the cause of such an unrest? It was the efforts of mainly one man who stood tall against the government of the country deciding not to bow down to the political pressures. The reason for all of us to be aware about the current scenario is because of this one man.

One man who stood tall despite the whole government being against him and still does, one man who had a vision and believed that the country could be saved from this malice, a Gandhian, Kisan Baburao Hazare, popularly known as Anna Hazare. This man needs no introduction. He has done considerable work not only against corruption but even otherwise. In his early life, he had been a part of the Indian army as a driver and survived an assault when all his fellow comrades died, this incident inspired him and since then, he has been a part of hundreds of causes primarily in his village of Ralegan Siddhi in Maharashtra for which he was even awarded the Padma Bhushan too. The man has been phenomenal in starting out a mass upheaval and a revolution against corruption.

It all started in the year of 2011, particularly gained momentum from the 5th of April when Anna went on a fast unto death at Jantar Mantar, Delhi, to demand the formation of a lokpal bill for the end of corruption. The whole world took notice of this man who single handedly shook the country, thousands joined him in this movement. Protests went on in major cities of India and the Indian youth intently took part in the movement in a matter of a few days. 3 days later, government agreed to all the demands and Anna ended the fast. Once the fast was done, the government played a waiting game. As expected, when the joint committee met on 30th May, there were differences because the Prime Minister, higher judiciary and other MP's were not included in the scrutiny and Anna went on fast again. Since then, many attempts have been made to revise the bill and make it acceptable. Finally, Anna wrote a letter to PM Manmohan Singh and indicated his intentions to go on a fast from 16th August in Ram Lila Maidan. However, Anna was arrested 4 hours even before he could start his indefinite fast. Anna refused bail and went to Tihar jail. Soon after his arrest, the whole country went on peaceful protests against the arrest. Youth staged a dharna  outside Tihar and the country rose to the occasion.

Anna was released and was allowed to protest peacefully. Lot of people do not have any awareness about the lokpal and jan lokpal bill, the jan lokpal bill was an improvement on the lokpal bill(which was devised by the government)and included the PM and other higher government officials. More can be studied about it(on wikipedia and social media) but the recent events have left a lot of questions in mind.

A person with a noble idea in our country is arrested before even starting a peaceful protest but a man who has done scams in the CWG was arrested after 9 months of conviction. Millions of criminal cases are still pending in the Indian courts. Nobody protested on a massive scale before this movement and the cause of corruption always took a back seat, yet when someone like Anna Hazare protested, the whole country followed. A man can go on fasting for the country indefinitely, but most people are sadly still hardly affected and consider this something of a normal occurance. We talk about out ethics, our values and we're the first to break laws and bribe our way out of situations. The government can allow it's provocative rallies to cause unrest in broad daylight and they arrest a Gandhian trying to fight for the betterment of the country within minutes!

 We all needed a leader and we have found one in Anna, the man has been phenomenal in his efforts to fight corruption. The country needs to support him in his conquest. Is our personal well being a matter of a bigger concern or is the future of the country more important to us? I'm hardly a person to comment on the government, people, even anybody's integrity or anyone's ethics but my values and views have always compelled me to support the truth. It's high time we think about the country and do what we can do what we possibly can!

I'm with Anna, supporting him physically or silently, in any way I can. Are you in this fight with Anna?

Source of dates and other info:Wikipedia

. . . Peace

Sunday, August 14, 2011


Peanut butter, a boon to mankind according to me. Tastes amazing when teamed up with a few other things. So well, I tried coming up with a few recipes of my own (copyright TM). I'm not a big foodie but I love to experiment with food and create weird combinations(some taste good, and let's not talk about the others :P). I love good food, I think everyone does! Experimenting with peanut butter has been an amazing experience simply because I never expected the product to taste anywhere close to good(worth eating would be apt perhaps) but somehow it always did(not that I'm a great cook, I'm decent though :P). So, here are 3 dishes I've shared with a few of my friends, Just thought more people deserved to know. There is no limitation as to how much of what to put so the recipe can retain the mark of your own originality..

So well, starting with the PBCNB sandwich(veg)

To make this, take brown bread, toast it slightly, apply normal butter on one slice and peanut butter(crunchy) on the other, take chocolate syrup and put it in any random way in between and close it. It tastes like the chocolate snickers  and is pretty good if you believe me. Worth a try, and by now hopefully you have figured out why the sandwich is so called, if you still don't get it, lookup the ingredients.

Next is the Peanut Butter Kebab Egg Sandwich(non veg)

This might sound bizarre, actually even is. When I made this, I stared at the sandwich for a good minute or two but it actually tasted really good. So anyway, make an omelette(normal or even scrambled egg will do), heat chicken kebab(you get them in the market), toast the bread slightly, place the omelette on one slice, put some sauce on it, cover it with another slice. Place kebabs on the first floor of the sandwich, with some more sauce. On the last slice, apply Peanut butter and seal the sandwich. The sandwich had a good blend of all the ingredients and tasted amazing. For a veg substitute sandwich here, you may try veg kebab and mayonnaise but how that would taste is anybody's guess :P( let me know if you try it though)

Last but not the least, the Hide and seek  jam sandwich(veg)

There was a time I associated Hide and seek with the game(childhood games sure were amazing) but of late, the chocolate chip cookie is all that comes to mind. This sandwich is preferably for lazy people like me who do not want the elaborate hassle of heating the bread(quite elaborate indeed :P). So you can just take the bread out of the fridge, cold as it is, apply jam on one slice, peanut butter on the other, put crumbs of hide and seek inside and seal the sandwich. Tastes good. 20 mins for college with the availability of jam, cold bread, our superstar peanut butter and a broken hide n seek biscuit lead to the invention of this sandwich.

So my friends, you can all try these dishes out and let me know how much you liked or hated them. Feedback is always important! Keep munching.

. . . . Peace!

Monday, August 8, 2011


Lonely nights and dark clouds,
Flimsy glass sparkled with rain drops,
Holding to yourself you lay alight,
There is someone who thinks within.

The pain you feel is not yours alone,
The eyes aren't as expressive as they used to be,
You lay submissive with a broken heart,
And someone breaks from inside into a thousand more pieces.

The rain lashes the far fields,
The lightning frays its wrath aloud,
The broken pieces are now beginning to hurt,
And someone dies from within along.

The mountains beyond speak of an evil wind,
One that swept away its only love,
The clouds have thus moved far beyond the horizon,
And someone sheds ironical tears.

You lay afloat this heap of misery,
Brought upon by unfortunate misapprehensions,
You try to battle your mind in conquest,
And someone battles for you.

You wish the agony would for once subside,
And lead to peace in mind and soul,
That the anxiety would just disappear,
And someone prays these things come true.

Someone loves the tricke of your seamless joy being your knight in armour,
Only to live moments that have not been,
Moments that may not be but to someone it hardly matters,
Because few things felt from the heart can never be explained!

Peace . . . 

Sunday, July 17, 2011


"Good old days" is the first thing that comes to my mind when I think about my school times. Though I've studied in Mumbai and Delhi too, I'd like to talk about my school times in Hyderbad in particular! I came to Hyderbad when I was in my 8th grade and joined Chinmaya Vidyalaya. The first day, when I walked into the gates of the school for the first time, I met C.Abhishek and Chaitanya and asked them where the classes for the 8th grade were! I was a little excited and scared at the same time. As I had seen C and Chaitu already, the 2 known strangers, I went and sat into the C section and I'm really glad I was a part of that wonderful section. Times that followed were blissful.. I met wonderful people while I was at school. There are some fond recollections and a few things I'd be talking about!

First and foremost, the class itself had a wonderful feel, it was nice associating with new people. It was fun talking and sharing experiences and the journey began! It was fun initially, flurry of extra-curricular activities, loads of events, the fun of being in a house.. Satya house it was, that I was in! I remember participating in creative writing, essay writings, caption making, and many such events. I remember that the 6 of us, Sudhakar, Shravya, Deepika, C.Abhi, S.Abhi and I went for an essay writing competition to a school(name I don't remember) and the 5 of them wrote on the topic 'Air pollution' and I went out of the line and wrote on 'Disaster management'. Abhishek Sreedhar came back to my home that day and told my mom it was a dry topic. We didn't expect any prizes but I managed to get an LED torch as a prize and was totally elated and flashed the LED in people's eyes :P and kept bothering Abhi with the 'dry topic' comment. I had a passion for writing and the writer in me took shape here. I realised that I had some talent and I worked towards it. A lot of credit goes to Jayanthy mam, who inspired me immensely and all my other classmates who also happened to be good writers. This encouraged me and brought the shy Sahil out of his shell!

Another part of schooling life was quizzing. The boys in our class formed a quiz group with Keerthi as the quiz master. I always teamed up with Abhishek Sudhakar, the other teams included C.Abhi, Navin, S.Abhi, Roshan, Ronack, Jaya, Ambreesh and others. Our team name was 'Sahil' and we always won the quiz(almost always). We hit the table hard(make-shift buzzer) and indicated we knew the answers. We ended up with red hands after all the bench-smacking we had done. We were caught innumerable times by teachers and scolded but we laughed it off always :D.

One of the best part of my school life was football. It was what I lived upon and one of the things I loved most. I skipped most of my meals to play football in the lunch time. I played left mid/winger for the school team. It was great, I remember attending only 1 session of school football training and never managed to get up at 6 for it! :P.. I remember running  to play football every free period we got and Principal mam scolding the crap out of Vineeth(bechara used to die always). I remember the amazing crosses I set up for Navin and Navin heading them into the goal. Few unbelievable shots that I managed out of fluke sometimes(trying to be modest :P). The in swinging corner kicks that I managed so craft fully! Football surely made life better and it was my way of expressing my emotions and helped a lot in building confidence and character.

There are so many other little things I recall, Ambi's superman and 'paper' dialogue that had us in splits. Football and cricket at Minister's road that was so essential at the end of every week. Meetings at Navin's home that had become a regular habit, playing with his adorable dog, Roger which was nice. Sudhakar's point to point mugging, Ronack's crazy jokes, C's height :P, Zeeshan's crazy logics, Bala's troubles with Hindi and his long full name, Susheela mam's teachings, Babita mam(naam hi kafi hai :P), Jayanthy mam's classes that we all enjoyed and the poem I dedicated to her that I still posses, Asian paints library incharge, Sudhakar's favourite Prasad sir(whom I loudly called 'sar-dard' in class but he never listened :P) and other fun stuff. Jumping off the school wall and going to Deepak store, Hanuman chat Bhandar and the million bucks we might have spent on chat there!! Green Olympiad at St. Ann's school and our blank shocked faces while giving that exam(we hardly knew few answers out of 100 quest), The field trip to Kerala which was just amazing(so much I'd like to say about it but would stretch this too long), those crazy fights with each other, those loud and rather offensive debates. Those sharing of lunches(mine was always eaten thankfully), the stinky classrooms after PT, those long walks back from imax alongside hussain sagar were all so special. The crazy link ups(the way I used to go red with anger when teased with the innumerable girls back then.. silly :P), Suri babu, our PT sir and his sad stories about his wife running away, singing janmadinamidam in full swing(we sang this instead of happy bday), kids fainting in assembly, principal madam's long speeches, going to dhyan nilayam for all pujas and events .. I can go on and on and on, there was just so much that happened!

School times were one of the best times of my life! There are instances when I want that back so much when we all bonded well, looked out for each other, had that amazing understanding of everything, the little innocence(that has surely disappeared by now) was something out of this world. These memories are locked in a corner of my mind which I will preserve and cherish for all the days to come. They make me smile every time I recall them! Wish I could go back to those days again when life was simpler than it is now, days were better, a smile on the face was natural and we lived life our way! Honestly, Those were the days! :)

Dedicated to all my school pals, the 3 Abhisheks, Kanta, Ronack, Deepika, Shravya, Shruthi, Chaitu, Ambi, Shashwat, Vineeth, Navin, Jayawardhan, Chaitu, Balakrishnan, Roshan, Ashwin, Zeeshan, Ritika, Apoorva, Hasitha, Nishchala, Pooja, Kruthi, Thisa, Syed, Suchitra, Sharil, Devender, Mohommed, Arthika and all the others I might be missing here

Monday, June 27, 2011


Supporting the cause of child labour awareness, a small way of letting my thoughts out!! Hope to help the cause!! Maybe not the best piece of writing but a small effort nevertheless!! :)

What's life like for a royal child?
Servants attending, all wishes come true!
The child comes to this world with a silver spoon,
Life is beautiful with complaints hardly few!

Go down the ladder to a normal lad,
The child leads an existence, ordinary yet joyful!
The extravagance is spared for all we know,
And the unfulfilled wishes may be plentiful.

But ever imagined life of a poor little child?
Living with the most minimum of resources.
There are hardly any wishes that might come true!
Lonely and alone, he fights life's cruel and wretched forces!

The child himself earns the meagre meal he eats,
Sweating out every ounce of his ability!
Yet the child is discarded and shown the door,
And labelled openly a cheap liability!

What may I ask is the fault of that unlucky child?
Who works to survive each and every day!
Abused, exploited and cheaply treated,
when children like us live life the easy way!

What would the child grow up to be?
A misfit in society fighting social regressions!
What values would he be able to give his kids?
While hiding in the past of his own reflections!

So is it fair, the ordeal the child is inevitably putting himself through?
Is it fair that he's made to face situations?
The treatment given is clearly unjustified,
The child clearly needs awareness and affection!

Does this child really have to suffer this way?
In the state of this disgraceful strife ?
We can help that child and we have to,
The child deserves another chance, to affection, to education, to a far better life!


Saturday, June 4, 2011


Let's  go through an incident:

A song is playing in my ears. I love the song, I close my eyes, my hands start playing imaginary chords, I might look like a madman to somebody looking at me from a distance but it hardly matters to me, meanwhile I picture myself on the lead guitar playing the guitar part of the song on a huge stage in a massive arena surrounded by tons of people, some of them even shouting my name!

The atmosphere is electric with people head banging their heads off, rock horns are in the air and a wave of musical bliss sweeps the arena. The drummer and the bass guitarist jam in tandem and lay the most amazing foundation  to the song. I come forward to give a solo on my guitar and the crowd applauds with a loud roar. The crowd is crazy now, cheering every beat of the drum, every note of the guitar and every word that comes out of the vocalist's mouth. The song is nearing its end now, the crowd is in a frenzy. The vocalist, bass guitarist and I come forward, take a huge leap in the air and come down hard stroking the final note to perfection.. Simply brilliant. The crowd loves us, the crowd loves me. And as the song ends finally, I open my eyes and come back to reality.

A strange distant dream perhaps, a dream I have lived day in day out in my thoughts when I listen to a few selective songs. I love music and everything about it. I love in particular the six-stringed instrument, the guitar and the heavenly sound that it produces. There are six strings E,A,D,G,B,E(I remember it by the phrase Eat All Day, Get Big Early), there are different sounds associated to the six strings, there are innumerable notes, chords and scales. The musical notes that look like hanging people sometimes involving minims, crotchets and some terms I've almost forgotten! Honestly, I was always fascinated by the guitar and the way people played it on stage, the music it produced and the feeling someone might get playing it! So well, I went ahead and got my own guitar, an acoustic one. 

Honestly, I've had very little time to learn it till now and whatever free time I've had, I've found something else to do. So the learning process is still going on. I haven't learnt considerable stuff to actually play on stage, nor have I practiced that much but I'm still looking for a time I can finally learn how to play it well and somehow give a performance on stage. I'm trying hard to fight this schedule of mine to make it possible. I may be doing Engineering but this is a passion I would love to pursue! I have started learning through videos in a dvd that my friends gifted me just recently on my birthday.

So what is it about music that most appeals to people? Is it the mere mixing of different instrumental sounds that makes a melody or is it something more divine than that? For me, music is something that appeals to the soul. Something that sets you free, and the best part is that you are hardly aware of the transition. Music breaks boundaries, brings people together. The sound of melody and the lyrics of a song need not be understood as it appeals to the heart and not to the mind alone. To sum up I'd like to add a few lines written on one of my T-Shirt which go like this:
"The greatest musicians in the world play not for fame, money or show but for the chance to connect with the spiritual divine" and this is what I aspire to do. Hope I succeed, the road to the musical dream has begun. Hope I get there one day with a crazy hair do, rock in my heart and guitar in my hand!!

-Peace . . . . . . .

Wednesday, May 25, 2011


The delight at the wonderful moments she makes
And the sweet laughter in her unusual babbles

Her childish innocence sparkles in her smile
Her world is a haven of joy and surprises

She has no envy or feelings of dismay
There is the innocent rage though that takes control sometimes

She doesn't hate anybody, she loves all
Her heart is pure and free from hatred of any kind

Her favourite things are as simple as chocolates and toys
It wouldn't take someone much time to befriend her

She's a bundle of energy packed with emotions of all kind
She runs around the house shouting just about anything

Her stories may have no begginning and sometimes no end either
But it would be harsh not to listen to her broken recollections

She doesn't take things to the heart,
she may flare in rage a moment and love you the next

Her hugs are lovable and priceless
She wraps all her warm affection around you

She's sweet, lovely and needs affection
Yet sometimes she's rather neglected or forgotten

She's as essential and important as any soul can be
She's indeed a pretty little girl in this big wide world

 . . . .

I write this poem for a reason. To celebrate the women and the girl child she was once. The importance maybe lacking sometimes but deserves it more than anybody!! About time we thought about it! :)

Peace . . . .

Friday, May 6, 2011

Things Unspoken

Inspired from my friend Ronack and his blog post , I've decided to come up with things ppl might not know abt me.. So well, here goes..

1. I've lived in 3 cities of India, changed 5 schools in all, made like a million friends(still counting :P) ..
2. I dance well, I've won many dance competitions, well that was like a long time ago, I stopped dancing after 10th but still love it a lot..
3. I sing sometimes, and I feel I sing well(English only, not hindi).. I had this dream of being a lead vocalist for a rock band , or at least the lead guitarist( still a dream yet)
4. I love playing th guitar, I love everything abt the guitar but I haven't learnt it till date :P.. Still hope I'll perform on stage one fine day.
5. There are a few things I really love in life, dancing, football, eating good food, writing.. Take one away and I feel incomplete.
6. I'm into everything.. and when I say everything, I mean EVERYTHING.. I feel I'm this one person who tries to do random things and I'm good at most.. I can write well(oh I suppose :P), I'm good at sports, I guess I play good football, I dance(Ron.. back me up here), I love speaking and motivating ppl, I play the guitar(mostly suck but do play it), I'm into music(like totally), I love travelling to new places, I'm a decent photographer, the list never ends.. there are a lot of things I do and I do them well..
7. I think a lot, like a hell lot.. I analyse everything that happens in my life, all incidents.. almost anything to everything and thus I spend most of my days contemplating how much better this world could be.
8. I respect women a lot, its something I've learnt and I cringe if I see someone around me who doesn't.. I have no respect for that cheap bastard(yenna rascala mind it :P)
9. Ppl say they understand themselves, I feel like a mystery to myself.. At times I surprise myself with things.. I'm still in the process of discovering myself.. That may take a while
10. I'm a nice person by heart, I'm genuine to ppl and I'm proud of it, I can go all out to help somebody, I expect niceness and understanding towards me and we're cool :)
11. I'm one of those ppl who're studying just for the heck of it, I hate studies, god knows where my life's headed.. Of late I've had this real aspiration to be a writer, but thats a job that needs no background so well why not be an Engineer and a writer( posh stuff)
12. I was an accident prone child, I've had horrible accidents, my face itself has 6 stitches, and many more on body, I've had burns, stings, sprains but thankfully never a fracture till now.. hopefully won't!
13. I'm kind of a loner, I can spend hours, maybe days and not talk to anyone and still be sane.. My biggest company is me myself..
14. I keep ppl at a distance from my feelings, u may know me as I am but u might not know wats inside.
15. I love all kinds of animals, but I'm scared of spiders, like really scared(hate them)..
16. I act like a happy soul, I can't see ppl around me being sad anytime so I try to cheer ppl up but I'm not happy with the way my life is in particular.. I have a dark side and I'm aware of its power and effects on me!
17. I'm a geminine and I behave like one, I'm unpredictable and I'm a different person with different ppl.. ppl might give 10 descriptions of me and none will match.. So let me clear it here, I'm serious, philosphical, a thinker, calm, composed, crazy, idiotic, foolish.. well all in one I suppose..
18. I'm a very cool minded person but I've lost it a couple of times and believe me when I say I'm dangerous in those circumstances.. I can kill :P
19. I don't sleep.. Or lets say I sleep too little, u might find me awake for as late as 4 sometimes.. when there's so much to do, Why waste time sleeping? :P
20. I always wanted to be an astronaut(blame Kalpana Chawla), later a doctor, then a wildlife photographer, then a rock musician, I wanted to do many things, eventually I'm doing Engineering.. shit happens!! We all know..

I guess I have enough points to bore anybody.. I'll add more as I think of it, the brain has just stopped now! God bless folks.. Peace out!

Saturday, April 30, 2011


The eyes are wet and the pain oozes out,
Speaks of the thousand unfulfilled instinctive moments.

The bubble of expectations has burst out in vain,
With the hopes out, nothing resides within.

A resounding thinker remains lonely,
To reflect on the unending thoughts that constantly resonate.

The thoughts inflicted with a constant flinching,
Of something withdrawn and withheld, unfair and unjust.

Why did destiny choose me is the far cry,
What made me deserve this despite devout benediction?

Its time I retaliate the rumblings of this distorted soul,
And torch my feelings out despite the repressive yet blissful ignorance.

So hold my trembling hand and take me high,
Let me off from the farthest sky.

Let me fall precariously in the vast emptiness you see,
Touch my soul, ignite my spirit and liberate me..

Monday, April 11, 2011


Its been a long time since I've written an article, looks like I've suddenly run out of ideas. Writer's block perhaps. So I thought hard about what to write next. A poem? Negative, I tried coming up with one but failed to come up with a decent sounding line. Poet's block too. So I looked for current topics, corruption came to mind but with so much being written and talked abt, no one would even want to look at what I write, let alone read it. Cricket ? By now I was so saturated with the amount of cricket I had been subjected to and with IPL here, I thought otherwise. What I write now maybe rusty and crappy so anyways bear with it.

So, finally I decided to write abt something that is so obvious in our nature, so deeply rooted and innate but we fail to perceive its need and importance. TRANSFORMATIONS. I'll keep it short and simple, and not go on for ages. So, basically I'm not talking abt physical transformations like into a devil all of a sudden or a swashbuckling movie star overnight, not even Laplace or Fourier Transformations but all the little transformations that go on within us. The Transformations in our nature, our action, our words. Transformation in our basic sense of being.

So what exactly was the reason for these transformations I thought. Looking from a personal point of view, experience was the leading force. Bitter experiences, good experiences, loss- personal or material, an aim, longings, the company u're in,deep regrets and then there are a million other things that influence us. Talking of transformations in ppl, people change, some for the better, some for the worse. Sadly, out of my experience and in today's world, most change for the worse. The change is brought not only by you alone but  even by people around you. Your company inflicts its influence majorly on you, so You can either get majorly screwed or become highly impressive depending up the presence of demotivators and motivators with you respectively!  And its really bad to see someone transform into someone vaguely irresponsible and mindless. Contrary to what I say, I have myself had some derogatory changes, some of which I'm not really proud of but then again, change is the only constant.

I'm not the person that I used to be. I may not be the person that I'm going to be. I will change, keep myself up to date with the flawed world and this wretched system around me of which I've become well and truly an integrated part. Transformation will be there, I cannot prevent it. Neither can you. We all have our changes as we go on. Life without change would be boring and meaningless. Change is what inspires us, motivates us, gives a meaning to our doings. And I welcome the change with all my heart. It will let me live and keep me going for as long as I do!

. . . . . . Peace out!

Friday, March 11, 2011


What seeps within the deep reaches of my inside?
A question lurking to bother? A truth hiding to hurt?

Why is it that the mind tends to overthink?
Abt things that hardly need a care than being vividly overanalysed

But There's a deep voice that calls out from within,
Reaching out for someone to listen.

It has noone it can confide in,
And tell the things it has withheld inside with pain.

The voice of utter desperation,of rage, of profound insanity!
Yet sometimes of a contradictory and mystique calm wisdom.

It longs for the understanding of anyone close,
Yet it dies before even ever being spoken out.

Things stay intact n yet they crack,
Breaking this world in the unseemly eyes.

There are many voices now, the longing is worse than ever,
But its so hard to drain this scared and apprehensive heart.

Will these voices ever come out?
Or forever stay inside making me weaker and stronger at the same time.

So now, looking into the deep dark abyss of my mind,
Was it only a voice I heard? What else will I find?


Saturday, February 5, 2011


I remember the last time I saw you, you were resting on the bed blessing me and wishing me a happy journey to Hyd.. Now 2 weeks later, I still can't believe you've left us all, that my grandmom is not with me anymore.. It feels unreal..

I recall those sweet times in my childhood when you totally loved me and adored me..
I remember you giving me 1 rupee for pop corn everyday..
I remember being bitten by a bee on my finger when you adviced me not to play with the bees and then you helping me remove the sting as I sobbed cutely..
I remember going to the park and finding lockets of gods and godesses and gladly handing them over to you..
I remember you making Tahar on my bdays and making me sit in puja when I always ran away.
I miss Shreya and I teaching you English words and alphabets which you had forgotten over the years..
I remember your chair next to the fridge and you watching Aastha and Sanskar channel all day long whenever you came to Hyderabad..
I remember your famous "kela khau?" dialogue
to Ayush which made us all laugh a long while.
I remember seeing you smile and happy and showering your endless blessings on our thread ceremony just recently..
I remember just so many things but they just flash me by!

Over the years after I had come to Hyd, we had grown apart but the shock and loss is unimaginable even to me. I still in my heart feel that when I come to Delhi, I'll see you resting on that bed, so glad to see your grandson come all the way from Hyd.. It saddens me that I'll never see you again.. You have left an unoccupiable void in our lives.. And though no longer with us, we have to live with the sad fact of never being able to see you again..You were the eldest in the family and I wish your soul rests in peace and is smiling down upon us and showering us with your blessings from your heavenly abode.. So with an empty heart and a silent tear, I miss you Dadi..

Thursday, January 27, 2011



Childhood, a word for some, a faded distant memory for others. For me, it was a world, my unaltered world of joy. Things I learnt then have had an ever lasting impact, more than anything or anyone in my life so far. Those days, though a little hazy in my memory were something else.

It all started with the dusty lanes of CA block, Shalimar Bagh, Delhi where I was born and brought up. The reminiscence of that huge playground of CA block still reminds me of my great endeavors and little escapades far from the reality of this busy world. Living in the world of our own, we were the kings of those dreamy castles we built in our heads, always coyly smiling at the thought of who our queen(s) would be.

One particular thing that denoted my childhood was 'accidents'. Yes, it was a very pleasant time but with the bundles of joy came a few sorrows too(life of a kid can be hard too). The accidents weren't cute or delectable by any standards or like cuts that your mother could kiss and it would magically heal by itself. I had major accidents, stating a few would be getting hit by a speeding scooter straight in the face and somersaulting a good 10 meters before halting. I escaped without a broken bone but did have my share of stitches under the nose that are still barely visible. Others include hitting my head on a sharp wall and bleeding profusely(another 3 stitches near the brows), cracker blasting in the hand, burning foot with boiling hot water, being attacked by monkeys and dogs, etc. There was just so much trouble I unintentionally got myself into. In fact, there are a few stitches on my leg, on the calf muscle that still make me wonder sometimes as to when the hell I got hurt there(still remains a mystery)

I was a very innocent kid who was loved by all. I hardly had any issues with my classmates either. "Teacher ka chamcha" as they called me, being obedient can get you beautiful tags. I got up every morning at 6 or rather was made to in the chilly winter morning of Delhi when the eyes just dint want to open. About the innocence, One such incident comes to mind.

Here’s another silly incident of my childhood. This was the phase of my life when I believed I was a scientist. Just like we all have our little fantasy worlds when we’re small, I was a nuclear scientist on that particular day but it was a short lived phase, more on that as u read along. Too much of Discovery had got to me maybe. So here I was in the streets of Shalimar bagh, New Delhi doing something crazy again.

Soon after Diwali, my gang of pals(don’t remember any of their names) and I, we formed a bomb collecting squad. All the unblasted stuff was collected. All the bombs which had missed their life's purpose of blasting were given a new lease of life or so we believed. We scanned roads, parks, buildings in search of these precious unnoticeable dynamites. We did a thorough cleaning job and anyone who bothered to look at us would be assured that the crazy kids were doing a sensible thing of cleaning which the lazy gardener failed to do. We collected all kinds of bombs, bijli bum (or bomb...more posh, same meaning), hydrogen bombs, flower pots, laxmi bombs, rockets, etc..nothing was spared.

So now that we had loads of unburnt bombs, we proceeded to the next step we called “masala nikalna”(we called it masala as it resembled the powders our moms had in their kitchen) ,we tore out the bombs and took out the powdery explosive and made a pile of the powder. Our aim was to collect all the powder, place it one container or the case of an old bomb, use the “rassi” or fuse of another bomb and light it up to give an explosion, as we believed, 10 times more powerful than a hydrogen bomb(another kind of diwali firecracker, not an atomic bomb for all we know). We called it the ‘superbomb’(or superbum as Delhi slang would have it). So, we put the stuff together and placed the fuse. No one dared to burn the fuse due to the reputation we had given the bomb, so I stepped up to the occasion. Little brave heart I thought I was. By now all that powder had covered my hands and even my face. I took a match stick and set out to light up the fuse and the unimaginable happened.

It was an early detonation to say the least. I had no time to run away, the powder set to flames and there was a huge flare that engulfed my hands for a wee bit, I thought I would burn alive so I shouted and my friends rushed to me. Luckily the flames died suddenly but not before making me look like a total joker. My face was all black, so were my hands. The world had turned upon the little nuclear scientist trying to devise his own bomb. My friends had nothing better to do than laugh at me. So, I headed home angry and frustrated at my luck, ran to the bathroom, washed my face with what I thought was Rin supreme and later tried in vain to explain the situation to my mom. It dint work anyways. I expected that this blast would cause a fatal injury to my brain but thankfully for my 7 year old brain, it dint. My days of being a scientist were short lived and I never tried to recreate the recipe of the superbomb again. It was gone for good but left behind a hilarious memory in my mind. :)

Saturday, January 1, 2011


A dark poem..Slightly Depressing.. before anyone draws conclusions about the origin of the character, the character is purely fictious and a creature of my imagination although Maybe the character has taken shape from the depth of my character and my previous disappointments. the most draining and serious poem I've done till date. Enjoy reading it!!

The sun shines through the window,it spills brightness
Illuminates the interiors with vibrance

The room is alive now shimmering with playfulness
Yet something holds everything back

The sun confers the winds to blow
Yet something holds its ablazing radiance

She's sad, her heart aches with pain
Nothing can outweigh her solemn tearfulness

Her face seems old with countless worries within
Yet so frail that the delicate finesse still prevails

She looks around the room with no respite
Yet nothing seems comforting to her

Her relentless hands undergo frantic twitches
Something unexplained goes on swirling inside her

Her cause for misery seems unjustifiable and unknown
She remains an undisclosed mystery ever

The vibrance of the room doesn't appeal to her,
It kills her, makes her world all the more miserable

So while the sun blares down its utter magnificience
She lies in her subdued world of darkness, good lord, what an irony..