My Undisclosed World Of Thoughts

I wish those smiles would last, I wish those joys would stay In the midst of a misty ocean, 
 Lies the frail spirit of dismay 

 Memoirs of a thankless life, Sets this wandering soul ablaze 
 Waiting for the sun to rise, 
 Hope lures the sense of redemption 

 Life seems to unfurl in this really funny manner, 
 Like a new chapter was written every page 
 To mock at our sense of judgment at each step, 
 And lead us to a whole new way   

 Striving for that one little thing from life, we all live, 
 something that someone else would easily acquire 

 And life smirks at us and takes that away, 
 Leaving us in this pain inducing solitude 

 Wisdom is all that pain gives but leaves a scar behind, 
 One that reminds us of how we were irreversibly ruffled 

 It's a blessing in disguise that these scars are invisible, 
 Because if they were visible, we'd all be so ugly! 

 Peace

This one's dedicated to one of the pictures of my friend Alok Jaiswal which prompted me to come up with a caption and the nothingness of the night and this worldly contemplations together reslulted in this poem! I do not wish to sleep tonight, for the stars outside shine so bright! Seeing the horizon light up the sky, with hazy dragons and little fireflies The heart plunges into deep thought Of this heart and those little battles it fought Times have gone when this heart felt sane The days of dancing in those lashing rains That warm smile at the descending of laughter Those little burst of joys my words were after Thinking about oblivion, bounded within rage Mind lost in wanderings, bloodshot eyes and this heart encaged In submission I've lost all my fears, my mind is running for the sky I stand in bliss rued by my ignorance, memories flash me by My life is a haven now, I see the lit horizon in sight Nothing matters anymore, wrong or right  Let me forget mys...

Brows of a nightmare, lashes of sorrows, False promises of better tomorrows Signs of a devil dressed in a holy robe, Descends like an unchecked force unleashed The flashes of memories that pass you by, Remains as a reminiscence of the unalterable past. Deep within lies a latent retrospection That hardly surfaces to ever bother the mind The hidden cries in the voice, the depth of the tone Concealed with perfection with the laughter of a clown What amazes is the subtle change of senses Remnants of a feeling of impossibility That once plagued this anxious heart To the point from there was no return The strange feeling of not knowing yourself, Of being a stranger to the world you know so well A sense of being out of place Dampens all the remaining spirits Is there light at the end of the tunnel? Or another cloud of darkness waiting in despair? Moving forward is the rule of life, I simply walk on wondering what lies ahead! Peace

Travelling has always been of great interest to me. It opens me up to the infinite hidden things that we miss and those many more people who change the way you percieve things! He asked me if I needed anything to eat.  "Saab vada pav, pav bhaji, misal pav, kuch khaog e?". I shook my head in disagreement and moved forward neglecting something that struck me right away. An impulse of acknowledgement, that something was out of place but I ignored it and moved forward to where I was headed. This was in Panchagani, where I had come on a family visit. We had gone to visit a place called 'table top', so called due to some god forsaken reason that I dint bother much about! So after the trivial encounter or so I thought, I moved forward to the ground which stretched to a circumference of 8km roughly and had a breathtaking view to say the least. We had come around dusk, so we watched the sun with awe and sat there soaking the diminishing radiance of the setting sun! Als...

A very old poem. Had lost it and found it thanks to my friend Soujanya Mandadi who preserved it somehow.. :).. An honest effort at overcoming the inner darkness and shining in the basking glory that the almighty showers upon us. Have fun reading it :) - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -- - - - -  It was a drastic and catastrophic sight, The darkest of all nights. I thought I was going to die of fright, I believed this was the last time I would see the light. I was broken from within. Bitterly disappointed again, Why from my mistakes could I have never gained? I thought frantically and came with no reply, I willed to end it all in one final try. One jump from the top was all it would take, To end this infinitive misery for heaven's sake. I took the jump in submission, losing all alternatives in sight, The jump took all my remaining courage and might. I had given up to the life I once adored setting any disappointment apart, All the sweet memories of life f...

"Corruption has eaten into our country like a deadly virus". How many of us have actually uttered these words? How many of us have just concluded that nothing can actually happen of this country, that this corruption will one day be so common that nothing will seem different. How many of us have frowned upon the thought of the level of corruption in India? I'm one of those people who have thought on these lines and somehow concluded in my mind that nothing would happen unless people changed themselves. That nothing would happen unless we ourselves stop being a part of it. How easy is it to be a part of corruption and escape, like for example bribe the traffic policeman after violating a traffic rule and escape the headache of a court hearing. How easy is it to bribe a person at the transport office and get a licence or learner's licence in an instant. Corruption in a way has made our lives easier but at what cost? It is at the cost of disabling and crippling a cou...

Peanut butter, a boon to mankind according to me. Tastes amazing when teamed up with a few other things. So well, I tried coming up with a few recipes of my own (copyright TM). I'm not a big foodie but I love to experiment with food and create weird combinations(some taste good, and let's not talk about the others :P). I love good food, I think everyone does! Experimenting with peanut butter has been an amazing experience simply because I never expected the product to taste anywhere close to good(worth eating would be apt perhaps) but somehow it always did(not that I'm a great cook, I'm decent though :P). So, here are 3 dishes I've shared with a few of my friends, Just thought more people deserved to know. There is no limitation as to how much of what to put so the recipe can retain the mark of your own originality.. So well, starting with the PBCNB sandwich(veg) To make this, take brown bread, toast it slightly, apply normal butter on one slice and peanu...

Lonely nights and dark clouds, Flimsy glass sparkled with rain drops, 
 Holding to yourself you lay alight, There is someone who thinks within. 

 The pain you feel is not yours alone, 
 The eyes aren't as expressive as they used to be, You lay submissive with a broken heart, 
 And someone breaks from inside into a thousand more pieces. The rain lashes the far fields, 
 The lightning frays its wrath aloud, 
 The broken pieces are now beginning to hurt, And someone dies from within along. 
 The mountains beyond speak of an evil wind, One that swept away its only love, The clouds have thus moved far beyond the horizon, And someone sheds ironical tears. 

 You lay afloat this heap of misery, 
 Brought upon by unfortunate misapprehensions, You try to battle your mind in conquest, 
 And someone battles for you. You wish the agony would for once subside, And lead to peace in mind and soul, 
 That the anxiety would just disappear, ...

"Good old days" is the first thing that comes to my mind when I think about my school times. Though I've studied in Mumbai and Delhi too, I'd like to talk about my school times in Hyderbad in particular! I came to Hyderbad when I was in my 8th grade and joined Chinmaya Vidyalaya. The first day, when I walked into the gates of the school for the first time, I met C.Abhishek and Chaitanya and asked them where the classes for the 8th grade were! I was a little excited and scared at the same time. As I had seen C and Chaitu already, the 2 known strangers, I went and sat into the C section and I'm really glad I was a part of that wonderful section. Times that followed were blissful.. I met wonderful people while I was at school. There are some fond recollections and a few things I'd be talking about! First and foremost, the class itself had a wonderful feel, it was nice associating with new people. It was fun talking and sharing experiences and t...

Supporting the cause of child labour awareness, a small way of letting my thoughts out!! Hope to help the cause!! Maybe not the best piece of writing but a small effort nevertheless!! :) What's life like for a royal child? Servants attending, all wishes come true! The child comes to this world with a silver spoon, Life is beautiful with complaints hardly few! Go down the ladder to a normal lad, The child leads an existence, ordinary yet joyful! The extravagance is spared for all we know, And the unfulfilled wishes may be plentiful. But ever imagined life of a poor little child? Living with the most minimum of resources. There are hardly any wishes that might come true! Lonely and alone, he fights life's cruel and wretched forces! The child himself earns the meagre meal he eats, Sweating out every ounce of his ability! Yet the child is discarded and shown the door, And labelled openly a cheap liability! What may I ask is the fault of that unlucky child? Who ...

Let's   go through an incident: A song is playing in my ears. I love the song, I close my eyes, my hands start playing imaginary chords, I might look like a madman to somebody looking at me from a distance but it hardly matters to me, meanwhile I picture myself on the lead guitar playing the guitar part of the song on a huge stage in a massive arena surrounded by tons of people, some of them even shouting my name! The atmosphere is electric with people head banging their heads off, rock horns are in the air and a wave of musical bliss sweeps the arena. The drummer and the bass guitarist jam in tandem and lay the most amazing foundation   to the song. I come forward to give a solo on my guitar and the crowd applauds with a loud roar. The crowd is crazy now, cheering every beat of the drum, every note of the guitar and every word that comes out of the vocalist's mouth. The song is nearing its end now, the crowd is in a frenzy. The vocalist, bass guitarist and I come forward, ...

The delight at the wonderful moments she makes And the sweet laughter in her unusual babbles Her childish innocence sparkles in her smile Her world is a haven of joy and surprises She has no envy or feelings of dismay There is the innocent rage though that takes control sometimes She doesn't hate anybody, she loves all Her heart is pure and free from hatred of any kind Her favourite things are as simple as chocolates and toys It wouldn't take someone much time to befriend her She's a bundle of energy packed with emotions of all kind She runs around the house shouting just about anything Her stories may have no begginning and sometimes no end either But it would be harsh not to listen to her broken recollections She doesn't take things to the heart, she may flare in rage a moment and love you the next Her hugs are lovable and priceless She wraps all her warm affection around you She's sweet, lovely and nee...

Inspired from my friend Ronack and his blog post http://ronacks.blogspot.com/2011/04/things-u-dint-know-bot-me-d.html  , I've decided to come up with things ppl might not know abt me.. So well, here goes.. 1. I've lived in 3 cities of India, changed 5 schools in all, made like a million friends(still counting :P) .. 2. I dance well, I've won many dance competitions, well that was like a long time ago, I stopped dancing after 10th but still love it a lot.. 3. I sing sometimes, and I feel I sing well(English only, not hindi).. I had this dream of being a lead vocalist for a rock band , or at least the lead guitarist( still a dream yet) 4. I love playing th guitar, I love everything abt the guitar but I haven't learnt it till date :P.. Still hope I'll perform on stage one fine day. 5. There are a few things I really love in life, dancing, football, eating good food, writing.. Take one away and I feel incomplete. 6. I'm into everything.. and when I say every...

The eyes are wet and the pain oozes out, Speaks of the thousand unfulfilled instinctive moments. The bubble of expectations has burst out in vain, With the hopes out, nothing resides within. A resounding thinker remains lonely, To reflect on the unending thoughts that constantly resonate. The thoughts inflicted with a constant flinching, Of something withdrawn and withheld, unfair and unjust. Why did destiny choose me is the far cry, What made me deserve this despite devout benediction? Its time I retaliate the rumblings of this distorted soul, And torch my feelings out despite the repressive yet blissful ignorance. So hold my trembling hand and take me high, Let me off from the farthest sky. Let me fall precariously in the vast emptiness you see, Touch my soul, ignite my spirit and liberate me..

Its been a long time since I've written an article, looks like I've suddenly run out of ideas. Writer's block perhaps. So I thought hard about what to write next. A poem? Negative, I tried coming up with one but failed to come up with a decent sounding line. Poet's block too. So I looked for current topics, corruption came to mind but with so much being written and talked abt, no one would even want to look at what I write, let alone read it. Cricket ? By now I was so saturated with the amount of cricket I had been subjected to and with IPL here, I thought otherwise. What I write now maybe rusty and crappy so anyways bear with it. So, finally I decided to write abt something that is so obvious in our nature, so deeply rooted and innate but we fail to perceive its need and importance. TRANSFORMATIONS. I'll keep it short and simple, and not go on for ages. So, basically I'm not talking abt physical transformations like into a devil all of a sudden or a swashbuck...

What seeps within the deep reaches of my inside? A question lurking to bother? A truth hiding to hurt? Why is it that the mind tends to overthink? Abt things that hardly need a care than being vividly overanalysed But There's a deep voice that calls out from within, Reaching out for someone to listen. It has noone it can confide in, And tell the things it has withheld inside with pain. The voice of utter desperation,of rage, of profound insanity! Yet sometimes of a contradictory and mystique calm wisdom. It longs for the understanding of anyone close, Yet it dies before even ever being spoken out. Things stay intact n yet they crack, Breaking this world in the unseemly eyes. There are many voices now, the longing is worse than ever, But its so hard to drain this scared and apprehensive heart. Will these voices ever come out? Or forever stay inside making me weaker and stronger at the same time. So now, looking into the deep dark abyss of my mi...

I remember the last time I saw you, you were resting on the bed blessing me and wishing me a happy journey to Hyd.. Now 2 weeks later, I still can't believe you've left us all, that my grandmom is not with me anymore.. It feels unreal.. I recall those sweet times in my childhood when you totally loved me and adored me.. I remember you giving me 1 rupee for pop corn everyday.. I remember being bitten by a bee on my finger when you adviced me not to play with the bees and then you helping me remove the sting as I sobbed cutely.. I remember going to the park and finding lockets of gods and godesses and gladly handing them over to you.. I remember you making Tahar on my bdays and making me sit in puja when I always ran away. I miss Shreya and I teaching you English words and alphabets which you had forgotten over the years.. I remember your chair next to the fridge and you watching Aastha and Sanskar channel all day long whenever you came to Hyderabad.. I remember your f...

--> Childhood, a word for some, a faded distant memory for others. For me, it was a world, my unaltered world of joy. Things I learnt then have had an ever lasting impact, more than anything or anyone in my life so far. Those days, though a little hazy in my memory were something else. It all started with the dusty lanes of CA block, Shalimar Bagh, Delhi where I was born and brought up. The reminiscence of that huge playground of CA block still reminds me of my great endeavors and little escapades far from the reality of this busy world. Living in the world of our own, we were the kings of those dreamy castles we built in our heads, always coyly smiling at the thought of who our queen(s) would be. One particular thing that denoted my childhood was 'accidents'. Yes, it was a very pleasant time but with the bundles of joy came a few sorrows too(life of a kid can be hard too). The accidents weren't cute or delectable by any standards or like cuts that your mot...

A dark poem..Slightly Depressing.. before anyone draws conclusions about the origin of the character, the character is purely fictious and a creature of my imagination although Maybe the character has taken shape from the depth of my character and my previous disappointments. the most draining and serious poem I've done till date. Enjoy reading it!! The sun shines through the window,it spills brightness Illuminates the interiors with vibrance The room is alive now shimmering with playfulness Yet something holds everything back The sun confers the winds to blow Yet something holds its ablazing radiance She's sad, her heart aches with pain Nothing can outweigh her solemn tearfulness Her face seems old with countless worries within Yet so frail that the delicate finesse still prevails She looks around the room with no respite Yet nothing seems comforting to her Her relentless hands undergo frantic twitches Something unexplained goes on swirling inside he...